Can We…Talk? // Open Thread
I’m sorry about the way I lit a comments bomb policy and then stomped off. Without getting into it, you get the keys to the blog and for once you sorta have the power to shut something off that hurts your feelings, so I did it clumsily and arrogantly, and obviously not well.
I’ve been described as a walking bag of hurt feelings, something that seems pretty accurate to me at this point. I’ve had a tough time with something personal since right before Thanksgiving, I’m trying to do something difficult in my career, and I’m not sleeping well many nights. I’ll be all right, I think, but I haven’t been nearly at my best lately.
[small smile] I think it shows in this morning’s work too, lord, that doozy is all over the place with mines I usually have the sense not to handle. I tried, it’s really all I have a lot of days, you know you’re not doing well, everybody can see it, but you didn’t give up.
I will, naturally, quite give up my petulant policy of banishment, I think when one has demonstrated a talent to fuck it up one shouldn’t touch it for a while. Things are precisely as they were before, and I’ll make sure later the one admin action I took will be un-done tonight.
I do think it’s very important that comments be a safe place, presently they are not for me, so I don’t often read them. I don’t think it will last, no, but I really do resent the cheerful cruelty that fucked me up so well for no reason. I have no idea what to do, but I’m looking at it.
I also don’t want any of this to diminish acceptance of responsibility for a real mistake that caused its own pain wave. I’m sorry. Please feel free to say whatever you wish, I’ll do my best to grow.
Anyway, I hope all you are doing well in these hectic times, and for once I have had a quiet day with a nap, soon to cook linguini. I hope y’all are in a good place this December day, I’ll be in the duty slot early tomorrow morning.
Please use this as an Open Thread.
Update from Mary:
Let me offer my apology as well to the community of regular commentors as I didn't get a chance to work through some of the issues until this weekend. I know that we have had a fairly wild and wooly comment thread with only the worst of the worst getting banned entirely. And I know we don't have a good policy for comment moderation, although we have discussed this before. My personal feeling is that although we've had some problems, from my perspective, our trolls have been more amusing with their wrong headed arguments than hateful. Last year, I had enabled the ability to disemvowel individual comments which I think is one of the best ways to combat bad behavior than outright banning. But it didn't work for some of the very worst so we had to work very hard to remove some of the worst offenders and I think we still have to monitor our comments for that type of abuse. But normally, I think our comment threads should be a place where people feel like gathering and talking. For me, that community of commenters was what has kept me engaged and informed about what was happening in the world even while the pressures at work mounted. I really miss that discussion and hope that we can reengage. (Snark, Iamcoyote, Judith, 6of7, idio, TikiAL and a whole bunch of people I really like to keep up with, I hope you will accept our apology.)
What level of comment moderation is acceptable for the blog? Should we try setting up a registration system? (We had problems when some of our favorite commentors couldn't get registered or didn't feel comfortable registering before, but I can see if it is easier to do so today.) We should also craft a formal commenting policy so it will be easier for people to know what is really out of bounds. I do expect our various authors to be able to "disemvowel" comments they are unhappy with so they can provide their own feedback, but I also expect us to work together (readers and writers) to continue to build our community. I'm really into listening to you.