Letter From California
01/24/10 0632.55 PST
San Jose, California
As the powerfully accurate and sexy KRON meteorologists promised five storms rolled into California last week on an almost daily basis, drenching the entire State and even inflicting damage on my tiny house, the lots on this street were never graded properly and in extraordinary rains the house can flood through the kitchen or bedroom doors. I thought I’d solved that but now water leaches up from the slab foundation in flood rains, a solution potentially costing tens of thousands of dollars awaits me as the fans whir, the brand new carpet and furniture tossed about my house as the place slowly drains out in two small rooms.
Life and problems happen, don’t we all know it. It may not be common country knowledge, but the governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger, recently decided a tactic to try and get funds for the State was to go the Feds and say look, I’ve got hundreds of thousands of tiny sick or crippled people we don’t have the money to keep off the street anymore, help us or out they go, the cruelty of life’s gutter for no reason? Oh well.
The issue is not that Mr. Toughguy Testicular Governator gave up on himself and his own people to go begging for help, cup in hand like any welfare queen, to the Feds. After all, many—including I—have advocated immediate cash aid to the States in these fun times.
What is of screaming concern is that turd of a public servant Governor Bicep risked the lives of our little people for his little government games! It’s never an option, the lives of our people aren’t bargaining chips in the psychotic level of incompetence employed in Sacramento. So easy for the nightmarish scenario of knifing hundreds of thousands of our smallest people to be avoided, yet here we are, Governor Bicep can’t raise the funds Stateside while the reaction from the Feds was decidedly, understandably negatively cool to the blunt threat. I mean, I desperately want California to get help but if I was Pelosi I’d instantly say no to that threatening asshole Schwarzenegger too, man, who wouldn’t?
If I were God or Obama I’d have the Feds make California an offer: $30 billion bucks for finally cleaning up and organizing your tax code so this never happens again, or no dice. No fixed revenue streams, no money. If we only had just a decently half-assed competent fiduciary governor the scenario has real plausibility, but with a guy who won’t even use the Governor’s office so he can so childishly smoke in his chickenshit tent, well, obviously it will remain just as much a fantasy as the Feds actually forking over a penny to Arnie’s recent little budget hostage ploy.
None of the other States got special tax relief money in the ridiculous, manifestly foolish unnecessary compromise to obnoxious Senators that stiffed our little people so cruelly in the last Federal “stimulus.” The rest of the country could legitimately ask, why should California get special treatment? With that babbling, threatening bozo of Governor too, hmmm?
Scale, my dear respected fellow Americans, as well all know it may not be preferred by size always matters. We’re number eight, we’re number eight! we often chant out here, the eighth largest economy in the world all by our left selves. That measly European summit they always get so excited about, the G-8? Shit, California is the real eight that matters, ‘n we’re you’re people, too.
Any best laid federal Obama plans, so infused with hope™ for the future, could so easily be derailed if California goes down. I would never dare threaten the Obama people in any sense like that shameful Governor Bicep of ours, I would only plead that real size on mammoth California economic scale should not be put in jeopardy with the future of the Party and country at stake.
It embarrasses me as a Christian and Public Administration graduate that $30 billion more is being asked for the war in Afghanistan this year when so many American States are hurting so bad, by the way. Go ahead and make all the weenie security arguments one likes for the necessity of it all, bleah bleah bleah, the stark truth of the insanity is plain for the rest of the planet to see, and I am embarrassed as an American we have such piss poor sense of fiduciary duty or reverence for plain decency and life. For fuck’s sake it’s so wrong, we have really lost our way with our time with the country asking $30 billion more for war in 2010.
We shall carry on and very soon take on painful serious hits, little people thrown in the streets or dying for lack of care, schools closing, parks gone. One day the idiots who did this to us will be gone and we will re-build the Republic that once propelled us to 8th largest economy in the world. We are not on that progressive path yet.