Turkana! I'm surprised at your shallowness. This stuff is, you know, NEWS! We need to talk about what's important. Besides, a couple of these topics deserve their own thread. Please let's get back to important things!
Since everyone is busily touting their favorite candidate with posts of varying degrees of logic, I’ve decided to lower the standards and share with you an email I sent to an old friend describing what I think of MY candidate, who so far, has been conspicuously absent from the debate. I must warn you, there’s probably something here to offend everyone. Hell! Even I am offended. To begin, I shall shamelessly paraphrase a famous line. Last night, when all was dark and still: I had a dream
What a difference a week makes! The young idealists, with nary an orange hat in sight, and the doughty clodhoppers of Iowa speak and the dice of fate roll snake eyes for some and sevens for one. With the image of Iowa firmly associated in my mind with such classics as Trouble in River City and the Minuet in G, perhaps it's small surprise that I was surprised at the extent of the improbable re-shuffling of the Tarot deck, to mix a metaphor or two.
Be that as it may, the intellectually evanescent lemmings of New Hampshire, despite their boastful claims of "independence" have been literally swarming the likable candidate who "won big" last week. As they feverishly climb aboard the shiny new Barackmobile, poor little Hillary seems to be left spitting dust and the "journalists" forget how to spell John.
NONETHELESS! I begin to think my dark and fevered dream may yet be prophetic! I find it difficult to believe that even the vacuous American electorate will rush to anoint such a relative cipher as the Great White er BLACK HOPE of the "Democrat " party without guidance from the trusted media. Given that Bill/Hill still has $100 million smackers and the darkest forces of the Beltway Brain Trust (cough*Mark Penn*cough) and the malevolently ignorant "Fourth Estate" is arrayed against him, I think the Obama avalanche may yet be stalled at some point short of victory.
The Great Game of the punditocracy for the past couple of decades has been to set up unwitting Democrats as, somehow relevant and then to pick him off like a tin can on a fence when they tire of their sport. To his credit, (and necessary for my vision) John Edwards has pledged to take his candidacy all the way to the convention. My murky dream of a bitter and broken brokered convention may yet come to pass.
By the time the Clinton clique and the Obambeleivers finish trashing each other, I envision a scenario in which Barack and Hillary (don't) share about 75% of the delegates between them and John Edwards, having garnered about 25%, and who won't sell his soul (at least not for what they're offering) to one of the other parties, stands alone.
I know Johnny's been "defending" Barack so far against Madame "35 years of accomplishing change"( What The Cheney? 35 YEARS???), but I believe it's only a strategy to get down to a 2-way contest between him and The Man OF Hope. I expect the exchange of plenty of poisoned barbs if that scenario occurs.
After a series of vituperative votes, with levels of anger rising to a cloying miasma of choked fury, suddenly, the very large doors at the back of the hall swing open and slowly, standing astride a sparkling white Prius, enters Al GORE. A few of the more excitable delegates may shriek, The GORACLE! before they swoon. Slowly, softly at first, the silence gives way to a steadily rising, ultimately euphoric chant: Al! Al! He’s our man! If he can’t save us, NOBODY can! (After all, it fits perfectly with the level of political rhetoric I’ve been hearing for some time now.)
I can see it now! After all, that's what visions are for, isn't it?
The Goracle in a glittering white Elvis suit, with matching cape, is being passed (ponderously) over the admiring throng like Alan Keyes in a mosh pit; to finally stand sparkling in the focused light at the edge of the podium. He reaches into his spandex and whips out his triumphant Power Point lecture showing how he will win the election and SAVE THE WORLD, using 38% less energy than his closest rival!
I also fondly envision a picture of the tragic, weeping, figure of Karl Rove in a tiny, dark corner of the Democrat Convention stage, cursing behind his curtain as reams of illegally surveiled extortion, including 8x10 color glossies, with circles and arrows on the front, slip numbly from his pudgy little grasp. It’s a stirring image suggesting a Raphael Chiaroscuro, with good versus evil in starkest form.
In the Control Room the previously jubilant, media color commentators sit in stunned silence. The loofah goes unchoked and a dozen falafels hit the table at the same time. A terrified Andrea M. dials her hubby, Alan, to pour out her terror. After a few moments, she screams in frustration, “What the Hell is THAT supposed to mean?” and hangs up. Joe Klein is driven insane and it’s three years before anyone notices. Emergency calls go out to a dozen make-up lackeys, but they are comforted not.
Throughout the world, as news spreads at the speed of the Internet tubes, church bells peal and tearful songs of joy ring out.
DAMN! I've GOT to stop having that second pot of coffee before sleeping! Well, it’s my dream and I’m sticking to it!
Whether this beatific vision is realized, or any of the somewhat duller crop of candidates eventually succeeds, instead, can we all agree to just be happy and vote for progressive sanity and against the heart of Darkness? I knew you could.
deminnj,
beautifully written, and certainly a vision of which dreams are made. one quibble, though- for chiaroscuro, you have to go with caravaggio!
Posted by Turkana at January 7, 2008 01:35 PMTurkana, as I said in your Inevitability post earlier, the more it looks like a Dem will get in the WH, the more tempted Bush/Cheney will be to "fix" the Iran problem before they slink out. I don't think they'll need much in the way of a provocation.
Posted by T2 at January 7, 2008 01:44 PMGet over the 'war with Iran' thing already.
War with Iran would completely finish our tettering economy.
There is no way Bushco will intentionally start a war with Iran right now.
Posted by snark at January 7, 2008 01:48 PMt2 & snark,
i think you're both right. i've written a lot about the warmongering against iran, but it isn't taking- with the public, the military, or our allies. but it isn't necessary to launch a full war to get the political effects cheney/rove/bush want. what matters is only that it be a story, and that people feel a military incursion might be necessary, or might just happen even if not necessary! particularly if it ends up a mccain-obama race, fearmongering will be the repugs' best hope.
Posted by Turkana at January 7, 2008 02:07 PMI dunno, Turkana, I'm more partial to El Greco, myself, though Vermeer and Goya have some outstanding examples as well.
And thank you for finally discovering a world outside the (YAWN) primaries. Too bad it had to be the (YAWN) Iranians again. So, they zip by our ships, throwing out litter, and our fearsome Navy is "threatened." I suppose they taunted our guys with thumbed noses and "your mother smells of elderberries" and the Pentagon wets its drawers and Billy Kristol gets a woody. Sigh. Sad what this country's become, isn't it?
Posted by iamcoyote at January 7, 2008 02:09 PMI too hope Iran is safe from the DICK & George idiot show. You certainly would THINK it would be too painfully obviously a bad idea.
Still, a permanent "Wartime Presidency" would certainly be to the DICK's liking and the rapture isn't going to happen without a little shove, now is it. George gets his ideas from a Higher Father dontcha know? When you're insane, shit can smell like gold.
Like far too many, this morning, I immediately channeled, "Gulf of Tonkin incident" on the news of coyote's highly probable and amusing scenario. If they had gotten 50 yards closer, things might have been very different.
Thanks for the artistic advice, all. I'll get a book or two.
Posted by DeminNewJ at January 7, 2008 03:11 PMNothing wrong with Raphael, DeminNJ, especially if it's a Rove analogy. Talk about your pudgy cherub! Though Caravaggio is usually viewed as the big name in chiaroscuro, Raphie's not too shabby. I've always had a thing for El Greco, so he's the first that comes to my mind. No matter - it was a great analogy, I thought.
Posted by iamcoyote at January 7, 2008 03:25 PMi love raphael for his sensuous beauty, but his chiaroscuro was of lesser import to his legacy. certainly, a case can be made for el greco or goya, but nobody grips me like caravaggio.
Posted by Turkana at January 7, 2008 03:39 PMOh, bravo and thanks for the mega-imaginative traum-post, DemNJ---best o' the day! A huge effort, much appreciated.
Predicting the final throes of the Cheney Gotterdammerung is futile---he's not all that calm and rational a customer (reports are he was melting down on election night 2004), and I think he has some ideas about what "needs" to be done before he waddles off the stage of history.
All we're talking about is a couple days of strategic bombing, there won't be a thing anyone can do to stop him, Congress won't even pass the Webb amendment telling Bushco they better not do it to scare the Admirals and Air Force Flyboys.....and no new Dem president will level any charges against the Bush Era Repubs---We're Lookin' to the Future, not the Past!
Posted by euzoius at January 7, 2008 04:51 PMDeminNewJ WOW! Are you sure it's coffee? Sounds more like a LSD trip.
Posted by Judith at January 7, 2008 05:50 PMIt is outrageous that anyone's computer hard drive can be 'inspected' at US borders. What's next? Sealed borders?
Posted by Judith at January 7, 2008 06:11 PMJudith,
Maybe it was just a flashback. I get them all the time! The hard drive story is one which I thought deserved its own thread.
For an acid nightmare, imagine the TSA staffed by Blackwater goons. They strut, heavily armed, around airports, bus stations and car rental agencies or maybe they patrol residential neighborhoods.
Anyyone who looks "suspicious" will be required to show a Real ID card. If they don't like your looks, (or maybe if they do) then perhaps a search of your belongings, vehicle, home or body cavities will be necessary.
Hey, they're only protecting us from terr'rists! You got a problem with that? How else can we stay the land of the free and the home of the brave? Thank you Chancellor Cheney! Can I have some more?
Posted by DeminNewJ at January 7, 2008 07:24 PMre: presumed serious Gulf of Hormuz naval incident.
Following the U.S.S. Cole attack in late 2000 (and actually even before), the U.S. Navy has had strict guidelines involving approaching non-U.S. naval craft, with a fleet perimeter "fence" being maintained.
Any craft, especially a small Iranian boat, would be instantly destroyed if it crossed this defensive line, especially with the possibility (after the Cole) that the craft might be packed with high explosives.
While traversing the Persian Gulf or Strait of Hormuz, U.S. naval vessels would be at highest alert, keeping a vigilant eye (and radar/sonar) peeled 24/7...with a defensive, surface buffer zone of several hundred yards around each U.S. naval vessel.
Thus, this "close call" wasn't really close at all...which means this news story must be a psy-ops plant by the Cheney war wing of the Bush White House, probably leaked to the press by Rumsfeld holdovers at the Pentagon, and leaked as a prelude to a stupid, preemptive, unprovoked attack against Iran.
Impeach Bush and Cheney NOW ! ! !
Posted by The Oracle at January 7, 2008 10:17 PMNot quibbling with the chronicle—‘tis awesomely written!—but as far as the quaff behind the inspiration, this sounds more like a ten carajillo too many than any other high.
Anyway, a great morning (for me) picker upper ;-)
PAZ